“…But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.” — Matthew 6: 33-34
There was a moment in yesterday’s Bible study when a part of me had to sit back and simply bask at what I was seeing and hearing and feeling.
Am I finally home? Is this real?
Laughter and conviction, sometimes an opening up of long-held-back floodgates, and always — back to the Word, the only bread we ever need.
I’ve been to so many churchy gatherings with strangers, only to walk away none the better. Nothing ever brought us closer, nothing ever lived up to their hype — not for all the Scripture in the world. How could it, when we come holding back the most precious parts of ourselves, the parts that shame and hurt and ultimately end up glorifying G-d, who understands it all?
For we are known by our fruits.
Something real is happening here. I don’t know how or why, but I can’t help but marvel at what is.
G-d really moves in mysterious ways. Cooler than any Hollywood blockbuster movie, better than anything we could cook up, with a wind-up, round-about left hook nobody saw coming.
I never saw this coming.
Last night, I counted at least five desserts floating around our crowded, messy, loving table, plus, baked ziti and curry steak.
In the middle of Matthew, a neighbor dropped off homemade brownies, and I was in the middle of it all.
I almost laughed out loud in disbelief and delight.
Two more joined our widening circle. There’s always room for more. They looked a little shell-shocked, yet quietly giddy, as the impossible began to dawn on them: this was no ordinary, hands-in-your-lap, call-and-response Bible study.
They looked like two kids who realized they’ve just landed in a pot of jam at the end of a rainbow.
They came because word is spreading about the great things G-d can do. Around a kitchen table, no less.
Jesus drew crowds a million times bigger than anything Taylor Swift could dream up. People would sit in the sun far away, just to hear His voice. Why do you think that is? Nowadays, we’d rather walk a million miles and wait in the suffocating crowd just for a glimpse of the Seahawks after their Super Bowl win.
Jesus is much better. Maybe all this time, I never really saw or heard Him in these churchy places. Maybe it was all for show. Maybe it was all in my imagination…
We never gave G-d a chance. Too many men of G-d kept getting in the way. Church kinda ruined His moment.
This was the kind of Bible study I longed for but didn’t think possible in people who seemed to be there just for kicks.
To them, Bible study is just another appointment, a fulfilling of obligations for two hours, then they go home. But home is a movable feast, home is wherever two or more are gathered in His name. Maybe they forgot, with their busy schedules, picking up the kids, dentist and doctor’s visits, holiday potlucks with their real family and friends, their inner circle.
They were entertaining, sometimes comforting, sometimes mannered, like famous actors in a passion play or a “Friends” sitcom, but they never came down off the shelf long enough to make a difference in my life. I could always tell they would rather be somewhere else, that this was a pit stop to better.
Thoughts and prayers.
The man who gathered us together, Dominic, can read the Bible (even the Old Testament) like it’s life or death, because it’s been and continues to be life or death to him.
Like many of us, he would be dead without the saving grace of Jesus.
When everyone turned their backs on me, EVERYONE, Jesus stayed and saw me through the worst of times.
I’ve learned more here, in one verse of lived, shaken, turned-up Scripture, than in all the years since coming to Christ in high school. Each and every time he turns the light on, he gives it back to G-d.
Because that is, after all, the reason we come, the reason for everything.
My husband prayed, out loud, last Monday. He is reading the Bible for the first time, really reading it from front to back, like a novel. He’s finished Genesis and can’t wait to see what happens next in Exodus.
If you knew him, you’d know this was a miracle in itself.
I can’t wait to see what’s next. I don’t want the Bible study to end. None of us do.
We’ve glimpsed G-d. Just a peek.
We interact deeper than we ever have with any other human being, perhaps even more than with the family we’re born with and the friends we’ve chosen.
We hunger for more, even more now that we know it truly exists.
It’s real. G-d help me, it’s real.
Often, we talk late into the night — about SCRIPTURE. Nobody has to leave early for a family obligation, nobody wants to. The family is here.
For the longest time, I didn’t think such a gathering could exist outside my imagination. G-d knew better.